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2003-05-13 - 12:16 p.m. - nonsense




trace it back to that dream you told me about. it made sense right there.

�we must not cease from exploration and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we began and to know the place for the first time�

everything is obvious

�we're not vibrating at a high enough level to be in contact with spirits. here on earth, we're too grounded. there's meditation and ways of.....�

have you ever experienced dreams while being awake? I'm not talking about daydreams. I'm talking about altered states of reality, when normal comes in waves interchanged with something that feels like a dream and you don't really recognize it or have control over it. after it has passed it almost feels like you fell asleep for a few minutes but you know you didn't.

... found to be no difference between the test group deprived of sleep and the group who were extremely intoxicated. so when a person reaches a certain state of drunkeness, they're basically in a state of being awake while asleep.... and when they fall asleep they don't dream, they can't dream in that state - when they wake up they're more sober and therefore able to pull themselves together usually, but they haven't truly rested....

looking at it and wondering what it's doing there. what is it doing there?

"the unconscious will tell you things, it comes out in dreams and in everyday life as well, in mishaps, slips of the tongue, odd interactions with people..."

"see I have a chocolate problem, so I know what it's like to not completely be able to stop, that's why I'm saying only do half. like say if you drink 6 sodas a week, this next week only drink four."
"a chocolate problem?"
"yes I have to have chocolate. I can't go without it"
"you can't or you won't?"
"I can't. I just can't do it. see I have this emotional thing with it... I have to have it"
"so if you go without it you get emotional?"
"no, I can't go without it. I just don't have the willpower to. It's like any addiction, like coffee or cigarettes or whatever... it's something that you end up needing and you either have to fulfill that need or replace it with something else. that's why people can't stop doing these things, because they don't replace it with other things."
the puzzled expression should accurately convey my confusion, disbelief and lack of comprehension. I go back to reading.

I decided I wasn't sure

�the strangest thing just happened. don't even know what to think right now�.can't believe it.... don't understand what happened...... never used to be like that...... just snapped....."

�during sleep deprivation the attendent hallucinations are in essence, dream images intruding upon the waking mind because they were prevented from appearing naturally in sleep.�

overly sensitive desensitized dissonance

dreams.... dream analysis

"so much to do it's not even funny. oh my god. oh my god oh my god oh my god"

why do smokers feel it's ok to completely disrespect the rest of the world? why, why, WHY? is it because they think if they're killing themselves, then other people need to be subjected to it as well? or is it just the same thing as the person who won't ever shut up? they just talk because they're a talkative person and therefore they talk. there is no focus elsewhere and therefore no recognition or regard towards other people

sound-dust battle

this doesn't seem to be the one. or maybe it was just different that night, in that environment.

"have you heard of that test where they ask you all kinds of questions about your life and it figures out like how old you're supposed to be based on your habits?"
"mine said I was like 4 years older. something about eating fish, because I smoked for some years, driving over the speed limit or riding in cars with people who do, and then just exercise and diet"
"so yours were smoking and speed then."

legs sticking out from under the bed. just legs, no body. something keeps coming through that outlet in the wall... the one where some sort of cable would plug into. what is that? that cat needs to .... wait... what cat? somebody is coming in the window. no I swear, someone is climbing in the window right now. what's that? what is that? I can't believe they make horns that loud. how is it possible to hear that music from here?

if it registers three zeros will show up but only two are.
"well what if it doesn't register. this one didn't and neither did this other one."
"well you would probably have to press the zero button to clear it out."
"yeah I did that, they still didn't register."
"really? hmm, well they both weight about 3 ounces so they should be registering on there."
"hmm"

reading out loud to see why it sounds wrong

"the significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking as we were at when we created them"

this isn't the one. this makes no sense.

still in disbelief about that statement. that's where this came from, for the most part. it's strange how someone can be so open and have so many alternative views about life, teach so many people to see things in different ways, yet still have that same block... calling it addiction? just what the hell is that? and to chocolate?

sugar. my mom said sugar is a government conspiracy. it's so harmful to your body, and look at how much of it everyone consumes on a regular basis. look at the health problems the people are facing. look at the nations of passive degenerative ailing overweight malnutritioned..... [sheep]....

it's as if it's all leading up to something....



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